Thanksgiving Dinner, with a side of Christmas Jitters.

Well, I didn't get better before Thanksgiving. In fact, I'm still not. But I'm ignoring that as best I can.

Thanksgiving was fun. I drove to my grandmother's house in Versailles. We were the first to get there, besides those who had come earlier in the week. My Aunt Nancy had the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade on TV. Do you watch that? I kind of forgot it existed. I don't know if I've ever watched it before. Abbie was very impressed, and sat watching the whole time Gran and I were getting things ready. Both my aunts were asleep in the den, and Mackenzie wasn't up yet. Josh went to get beer with my uncles. Oh, and my mom's youngest sister was out for a walk in the woods with her husband. My cousin Hannah and her mom both got lost on the way, poor kids, but the driving was free of any real disasters. When my mom arrived, I got bumped out of the kitchen. I spent the whole day talking, even though I had some serious laryngitis. The food was not balanced at all, but was tasty. We somehow ended up with 3 turkeys, plus ours which we had brought so Mom and Dad could taste the Alton Brown version. And we had brisket and corn and my squash, and green bean casserole, gravy and mashed potatoes, and cranberry sauce, and 3 stuffings (though 2 were the same), and Waldorf salad that I didn't get any leftovers of. We also had sodas and beer and LOTS of wine, and cran-apple juice for me, and French silk pie and pumpkin pie and some fruit (peach? apple?) pie that I wanted some of, but was too full and then too late, and mom made chocolate chip cookies. Oh, and 3 different loaves of St. Louis Bread Company bread.

The guests were: Uncle Bobby and his wife, Betty, and Mackenzie, Uncle Pete, Uncle Tim and his wife, Laurel and Sky and Kelsey, plus his daughter Hannah and her mother, Rosy and sister Hillary, my parents, husband and children, my Aunt Nancy, my Aunt Kathy and her husband, Bob, and an old family friend, Ms. Laura, and my grandmother's sister-in-law, Aunt Betty. Oh, and we brought Jake, Hannah brought her dog, Carmen, and Hillary brought her beagle, Isabel. A full house, no?

Hannah was the most excited about the pictures, and is going to make enlargements for her house of some the old black and whites of my grandparents, and of her dad in his football uniform. He actually had my favorite quote of the day while looking at that picture. He was TINY!!! He laughed and said, "When I was 16 and got my drivers' license I put down that I was 5'1" and weighed 105 pounds.....and I lied on both!"

Well, Thanksgiving was great fun, but it was too much for a sicky like me. Josh drove home, but I couldn't sleep or anything. I felt dreadful, and couldn't even sing Christmas carols all the way home. You never notice how much singing you do until your voice is gone. Friday, I was much, much worse. That is particularly not fun, because I wanted to go out Friday night with my old friends who were in town, but it was obvious I was much too sick. I sent Josh and stayed home with the kids. He came home Saturday morning and slept on the couch half the day.

Josh took Grant to his first Rams game on Sunday. It was Josh's Christmas present from his dad. They had a great time, and I stayed home with Abbie. We watched Winnie the Pooh. I started to get some blessed sleep, but Abbie noticed, and woke me up violently. Then we danced until I started coughing, and listened to Christmas music on Youtube. Josh brought soft tacos for dinner, which was just what I wanted. Still wish I had some apple pie, though.

Last night I actually got a few hours of sleep. I was hoping to wake up recovered, but not so. Maybe tomorrow.

All my friends are asking me if I did any shopping on Black Friday, or what I am getting for my family for Christmas, or what Santa is bringing the kids. It's hard to know what to think. The truth is, I've made no lists of presents to buy. I don't know what to do. I mean, October and November I got multiple notes from the bank, complete with insufficient funds penalties. Christmas is a scary, insulting thing to me this year. I still need to pay my personal property taxes, and now I feel like a bad person for not loading up my Santa Clause bag with presents for everyone I know. Yes, I WANT to do that, but it doesn't seem like anyone understands that I can't. I don't even know what to do about my own children, but I'm already getting lists of things I'm required to bring to all the family Christmas parties Josh insists we are still attending. Josh is the worst of all. We decided that we could only afford a present each to Grant and Abbie from us, and one each from Santa, and stockings. He's already dancing around because he got me something. I know he's trying to make me happy...but....

Anyway, I had planned to decorate the house this weekend, but I might do it next weekend. I should be better by then. Josh needs a haircut then, too. He has his job interview a week from tomorrow. Then, I have my hair appointment that Friday. Then, the Christmases begin. How am I going to make it?

But you want to know what I am looking forward to? Visits from friends. Ms. Darci is coming the week after Christmas, and that is going to be great. And then Rob is coming in mid-January, and we are already making plans with his sister to go out.

On a completely different note, Abbie's 4th birthday is the first week in January. I'm having a party for her on the 9th. It is finally decided. It will be between lunch and dinner (haven't picked a time yet) and all are welcome to show up in a costume. Yes, it's the Birthday Costume Tea Party. All are welcome. Oh, and Abbie doesn't want anything for her birthday. What she wants is to see her friends. If you feel weird coming empty handed, just bring your favorite tea, and I'll boil some water for you.

Sorry I'm not especially eloquent today. You can tell I need something to read, can't you? Well, I'm going to spend today recovering from illness, and then we'll see what I can come up with, later.

I'm so cold! I'm getting tired of apple cider, but it has 100% vitamin C, and makes my throat better. Maybe I'll go make some now. This message sounds pretty cranky, but I promise you that I'm actually doing much better, and even have intentions to enjoy my day, if possible. Hmm. That sounds cranky, too. Well, if Grant weren't being so mean today, it would be a perfectly nice day. My kitchen is sunny. (There. That's much better.)

Happy last day of November!

Feed a cold.....

Hello! I am ill. Seems like the flu. I have until Wednesday, preferably in the morning, to get better! That is my goal.

And now...some GOOD NEWS! Josh got a letter saying that he has been selected to interview for that dispatcher job he wants. We are all very happy about that. I'm not sure what the odds are at this point, and Josh will still be looking for other work, as well. But we should all hope he gets this one, since it is what he wants. Josh is on the good list. He brought me chicken soup and toast in bed.

Friday night, I was pretty out of it. Josh loaned our car to his mom, but I don't think I even noticed, really.

Saturday, Josh and I combined our efforts and cooked up a 13 pound turkey (gift from Mom) Alton Brown-style, complete with brine. After warning them of my illness, Josh invited a ton of people over. Our neighbors ended up being the only ones who wanted to come, which was fine for me. Too many people would have done me in. I made stuffing on the stove and green beans, and Becky brought a pumpkin pie. It all tasted great. The buttered green beans were the best for my sore throat. There was a little blood when Grant and Bree bumped heads twice in 2 minutes. The second time, Grant's lip split. That's what happens when you don't listen to Mommy when she says, "Don't play rough on the rocking chair." We played Monopoly, and somehow I ended letting Kirk borrow my books again, and they left around 9:30. I went directly to bed. Well, after I carved up the rest of the turkey and got it baged and refrigerated.

I really wanted to get to taiko on Sunday, but was just too sick. So I stayed home all day, even when Josh and the kids took Jake to get his toenails clipped and return another computer to Josh's parents (they frequently ask him to fix their computers).

Abbie had another nosebleed. The first time I tried to help she jerked away, so there was blood everywhere. Finally, though, I got her to let me pinch her nose, and she even helped me count to ten. I'm hoping she learned something from the experience and will suddenly cooperate, but that might be a little far fetched.

Today...I'm going to veg. Really. Okay, well, I'm going to make lunch first, but then....total vegetation!!! Hopefully.

I'm reading Daddy Long Legs still. Well, I started it before I went to Versailles and put it down, and this weekend I picked it up again. I am once again struck with several things - the same things that always strike me when I read that book. Thing no. 1: What the heck is it that we call education these days??? This girl is required to know so much, and these days there is so much more to know about....why have we gone backwards in our expectations???? Um...I'll stop there and save you from hearing me rant again. Thing no. 2: People (as a population, not individuals, although you have to start somewhere...) just aren't nearly as nice these days. It's so hard for me to make my kids into good, nice people with no good examples. I think it's so hard that most people give up. Or they want something else for their kids. I knew a woman who didn't want her son to be a victim, so she made fun of him a lot so he would be "thick skinned". No one will be surprised to hear this, but he made fun of the other kids at school, and then blamed them when they didn't like him. She chose that? I would be more proud of a victim than a bully. I would prefer to not contribute to the unpleasantness around here. But not everyone is like me. Obviously. Look at what they encourage in their children. And then, children are born with their own agendas and don't often listen as well as that kid. Thing no. 3: I would so hang out with Jerusha Abbot! Maybe she's like me in a way that no real people are. Or maybe it's something else. Hard to say. But she's just so lovable. I get her.

It's Thanksgiving week! Are you warming up your gratitude? Shall I recite my Thanks to you?
"I am thankful for the good health of my family, and the time we are able to spend in one another's company. I am thankful for the wealth of the past, the lessons of the present and the hope of the future. I am thankful for the liberty of my country and the American standard of living. I am thankful for my abilities, and the opportunities to improve my self and my life. I am thankful for my dog, my hard-working husband, and my charming, intelligent children. Especially when they are all behaving themselves." I am also thankful for you guys. MUAH!

Mom says my horoscope says my life is about to improve drastically. Do you think so?

Have a good week, my friends.

News, news, news.

Either not much is happening in the news this week, or I need to look into better ways to get news. But I am definitely glad that I know Mariah Carrey wants white kittens and doves wherever she goes. Seems to be a conflict of interests, if you ask me.

Well, do you want the bad news first, or the good? Let's go in chronological order. Yesterday my mother came over and watched Abbie while I took Grant to visit his buddy the dentist. We know our dentist very well. Grant had his first serious cavity when he was 2. You may remember that Grant had a swollen cheek from a tooth infection earlier this fall. The back molar on that side was the problem, and still is. It needs a procedure called a pulpotomy. It's the baby tooth equivalent of a root canal. They drill all the way down to the pulp, insert an antibiotic tablet, then fill it back up. He also needs 7 fillings. Dr. Dooley says that if Grant is good and still and quiet, they might be able to get all of that done on his next visit, which is scheduled for Dec. 17th. If he's wiggly or uncooperative, it will just be the pulpotomy.

More about baby teeth: They usually don't require much work. If a child Grant's age gets his first cavity, the dentist (at least ours is like this) will sometimes leave it, unless it is causing the child pain, because they fall out. He says preventing pain and retaining tooth function are the only two reasons to work on baby teeth. With Grant, who has been having bad, fast growing cavities since age 2, we have to worry about him still having enough tooth left to chew. He explained that until Grant's 6 year molars are in, he can't really consider pulling any of the teeth. For his bottom molars, there is already less tooth than filling. On the good side, all of Grant's front teeth are fine, which is unusual for kids who tend to develop the fast growing cavities. Sadly, those will be the first ones to fall out.

Abbie did not see the dentist. Her teeth are perfect.

All afternoon, I had a terrible headache. Some people have suggested that maybe I gave it to myself by worrying how much money I'm going to need to fix Grant's teeth. And pay bills. And renew the car registration. And pay for Josh's class. And pay homeowners' association fees. And make it through Christmas. Motrin and lots, lots and lots of water did not help. I stayed home from taiko practice.

But! It turned out to be the best idea. It turns out I was getting sick. I am dizzy today, and my head feels too heavy, and my headache is now a sinus one, etc., but at least I didn't share my germs at practice. My current job is to get better before Thanksgiving. Wish me luck.

Speaking of jobs, I am still looking through a bunch of work from home stuff. My savior, Missy, sent me lots to look at, and I did a lot of that until yesterday afternoon. I've only applied for one job so far, but I have my eye on several. Might take a break today and just veg.

Now, for the latest news! Our mortgage refinancing came through today! Did you know that notary republics make house calls? I drank hot cider (has vitamin C) in my own kitchen while signing the new papers. And the best best news of all is that I don't owe any house payments until January 1!!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!!

In other news, I talked to my brother yesterday. So that is all fine again. I think he is even going to call my mommy today. Speaking of Mommy, I did some Christmas spying and sent a secret email to my dad at work telling him something to get Mom for Christmas. I love it when I can do stuff like that. I hope she likes it!

We're switching to the Wal-mart cell phone plan. (I pretty much hate Wal-mart, at least in the abstract.) Josh has a new cell phone. How is it that when we are dead broke, Josh still gets new toys? We still don't know what's going to happen with my phone.

I didn't sleep well last night. Geh.

My mommy gave us a turkey. I am not really a turkey person. I am a chicken person. Josh dug out an Alton Brown DVD and tomorrow we're gonna make some turkey.

For lunch we had chicken soup and toast. It was a huge hit.

Hope you are all about to have a fantastic weekend! Sick people like me hardly notice that it's Friday, but we sure know the first sunny day in a month when we see it! Go take vitamins. Don't get sick!!!

More drizzle on a Wednesday in November.

Since Josh's contract job in Rolla ended abruptly (only a few weeks after Abbie was born), we've been walking down, down, down into the canyon of This Is Not Cool. And if what we were doing before was hiking, this season, starting with late summer, has been an absolute landslide. The only trouble is, I am not convinced this canyon has a bottom. Several times I was sure we were nearly there, but not so.

Yes, Josh is looking for night work. Yes, I am looking for work from home. Yes, we are considering dropping the phones and even the Internet (this is even while Josh's other class is an online one), and Netflix, our one and only luxury, is practically gone already (waiting for the end of the billing cycle, is all). HOWEVER, I do not choose to sit around pondering our decline. I have more important things to think about. Like where the orange crayon went, and whether tyrannosaurus rex eggs were as big a Uluru. We have determined that they were not. But we still wonder if dragons like to swim.

We had some rough spots this morning. Abbie fights me alot, and says no. She is touchy, and does the whiny, angry thing. And while I am trying to change that, Grant encourages it. What is it about boys? He finds something that upsets her, and then does it (as quietly as he can) until she is shrieking or crying. Who does he think he's fooling? But, later, we recovered. We were pretending to be peacocks, and the blankets were our colorful feathers. We drew some pictures, too, but then there was some disturbance over the refrigerator magnets. Wanna hear about the highest possible form of entertainment at our house? Standing on the vents when the heat comes on. My kids would stop just about anything to go stand on the vents.

I really should be cleaning the entire house. My mom is coming to watch Abbie tomorrow while Grant has his dentist appointment. I also need to do some kid laundry. I've only been doing grown-up laundry. Ooops. And Josh is running out of socks, too.

Just in case you are reading this and hapened to miss taiko, due to some anniversary of sorts, I'll let you know how that went. First of all, I picked up Brandon. I still have no idea why, but after I picked him up, the "auto" function for my lights stopped working, so I just turned them on regularly. We were the first ones there, and we picked up the room and got out all the taiko stuff. When Jenn got there, she told me my lights were still on. DOH! I have been spoiled by the auto-ness! So, I ran all the way to the commuter lot, just in time to see my lights turn themselves off. Growling, I opened the door and put the lights back on auto, just so I would remember to do it manually. Trust me. I know what I mean. Then, I ran back to practice. Andrew said, "Good. You're just in time."

"Just in time for what, warm ups?"

Practice consisted of the 6 minute drill....twice. (Wouldn't want to be uneven.) Then Yatai Bayashi. Then movement drill. The reason for taiko-robics came out later, when Andrew confessed to having eaten too much dessert Monday night. We worked on Tsurugi for most of the rest of practice. Oh, yeah, and St. Louis Bayashi, just in case we had any energy left. It would be the day I sprint to the commuter lot. I'm surprised that I'm not sore. I should be.

In a minute, I'm going to shower. We're going to go to Planet Fun with Eddie ( HI, EDDIE!!!) and Jenn, and Baby Eddie and Carter. We are all very excited.

Sloppy Joes for dinner - woot! Happy Wednesday. It's definitely soup and toast weather.

I'll have the Politics A La Carte, please.

The constitution of the United States does not give you the right to a car, a job, a house of any kind, a cellular phone, a computer, or even food. You are not owed these things by your government in any way. It does, however, allow you the opportunity to get one or all of these things for yourself. That is your right. So sayeth the constitution. However, somewhere along the way, the government did start providing homes and food and even jobs, even though it is not, by the constitution, required to. I think that may have been the beginning of lots and lots of confusion. And it was the beginning of the end of self sufficiency, too.

A point that was brought up by my uncle, who refers to his political alignment as "Constitutionalist",is that the constitution includes a passage that says the United States government as outlined in that same document will only work for a "educated and virtuous" population. Well, looks like we're screwed, Folks. As far as I can see we are neither, as a group, and I can't think of many individuals who fall under either category, much less both at the same time. But you already know what I think of the educational standards this country has.

I tried to find out my own political alignment, you know. I took probably 20 little quizzy things. None of them came up with the same answer. Wanna know why? Because it all depends on what question you ask, and how you ask it. And what gives with the current parties, anyway? My uncle, the Constitutionalist, says that any time a new party tries to emerge, the party who is most similar to it has a panic attack, afraid of losing representation in Congress, and drives them away. Are we neighborly, or what? I can see it, though. But I've got news for you folks:

Take a look around. We're plummeting. Things are not getting better. Not going to point a single finger, because this downward spiral has been long in the making. However, I know Americans. This will not go over. Something is going to happen, and you'd better hope it's something as simple as the emerging of new political parties, because I foresee something a lot more destructive. And as much as I would like to avoid it, it is necessary. Change must and will occur.

Did you know that right now entire downs are collapsing? Do you actually know what I mean by that? Take, for example, my grandmother's town of Versailles, MO. My aunt works at Gates there. They are one of the few remaining US factories, especially now that all the car companies have failed. She is a particularly hard worker, but even if she weren't, she would be now. There are no other jobs in town, should she lose hers. None. ZERO JOBS. Not Wal-mart, not Taco Bell. ZERO JOBS. Gates keeps firing people, and then my aunt has to add the jobs of the former employees to her work, and still get it all done in the same amount of time. But you can't complain. Why not? That's ridiculous! Because the response is, "You don't like it? Quit. The line for your job is 10 people long." And it's true. So take care of your crappy job, because there are none left in town. Or the next town over. No kidding. Eldon, MO was hanging from a thread named Car Dealership. All gone. What is going to happen to the people who live there? They won't be able to sell their homes if no one is moving into the community. And this has already happened. How many small American towns are about to become ghost towns? How does one survive without income? Hope you know how to garden, Kids.

I'm sure that many of you are about to list all the government programs that would/could/should swoop down and save these poor communities. And you may. It might even happen. But the government doesn't have money. Sadly, there is no spring-fed treasury in Washington D.C. The people have money. Then we all pool it together and it has to last the whole country and take care of all the separate and combined needs. That's even before you count the promises of the politicians that they have to make good on or lose the next election. Personally, I have no proposal for helping the shriveling towns. I'd like to, though. All I can think of is industry, and I don't see anyone else embracing that concept this week.

Well, that's enough of this week's installment. Feel free to comment...all 2 of you who read this.

The Cemetary and the Flag

Hello, there. I am having a pretty good Friday the 13th, are you? Well, I've been misspelling words even worse than usual, and Josh forgot to put the trash out, but otherwise, the day has not been in the least bit horrifying.

Yesterday I came home from Versailles, with Jake and the kids riding with me. That was the end of my trip, of course, and it was exhausting. But I think I'll start at the beginning instead.

On Sunday, we came home from Osage Beach, played with the neighbors, and packed. Monday I baked the cake and finished getting all the things ready. My mother came for the kids around noon. When she walked in, she looked at the dog and said, "Hey, Jake! Are you ready to go?" I was so shocked. I hadn't even thought about Jake going. I had been telling Josh that he and Jake were going to be bachelors together. After they left (with alacrity), I got ready and left, myself. The first evening, we went to Nanny's house to watch the gravel guy pour more gravel on her driveway. His name was Ernie Hibdon. Apparently, he grew up with my Aunts and Uncles, and my mom even watched his son for a while when we were all living in Sunrise Beach. I must have been 2ish. The pouring of the gravel lasted maybe 5 minutes (and very fancy and tidy, too, I must add). We were at Nanny's house for an hour and a half. Ernie is a talker. It was cute....and long. Nanny came home while we were there, and we all went back to Gran's to have some of my cake. We were all too tired to go to the fun event that Gran had planned. It seems that one of the little Mennonite guys was doing an (no kidding) opera workshop. Later, Gran was horrified that she didn't take me to it, but we really were too tired. All of us were. Instead, me and Gran had a "slumber party". We took snacks into her room and watched My Favorite Year.

Tuesday, we did lots of work going through old family photos. There were 7 suitcases full. I was sorting them into envelopes for each of the children (my mom and her siblings), an envelope of my grandmother, of my grandfather, of the two together, of her mother, her mother's family (Geiger or Gyger, depending on who was doing the spelling), his family, pets, family group pictures, houses, landscapes and flowers, friends, military reunions, other trips. We did this most of the day, with breaks to fuss about politics with my Uncle Pete or gossip or eat.

Wednesday, we did more pictures and got them all sorted. Then, we spent a lot of the day in Versailles. First, it was Taco Day at B&B's, so we had tacos. We made some copies of pictures of my grandfather, and one of my grandmother's only baby pictures. We shopped at Wal-mart, and then.....we walked the Versailles cemetery. We were visiting family. We visited my great grandmother and her husband. We visited Gran's favorite grandmother, "Mimi". Her name was originally Edna, I think. Or was it Edith? Her middle name was Merle, and when she was little, was called Merley so much, that she officially changed it to Merle E. Webster. She married a Silvey. Gran refers to him as Dad Silvey (short for Granddad, of course) and she was Mom Silvey until one of Gran's cousins called her Mimi, and then she was Mimi forever. Gran and her parents lived with them for a while during the depression. The men farmed. They canned food, and Gran helped, even when she was tiny. Mimi would go to the less fortunate neighbors and say, "Oh, can you help me out? I canned too many beans this year! They'll go bad if they don't get used. You take these. I'll need my jars back, though." And that is how the neighbors helped each other even though they were proud. Mom Cleo, Gran's mother, married Ferdinand Geiger. He was a farmer, and Cleo wasn't happy. (She had wanted someone else, but the family hadn't approved.) So, later, she left her job as a schoolteacher for some guy named Quincey or Quentin or something, and lived in Kansas City. But immoral women lose their teaching licenses, so she worked in a factory. Ferd Geiger loved her to the end, and left her his house in Fortuna, Missouri. She shouldn't have taken it after leaving him so thoroughly, but she did. She was a perpetually dissatisfied woman, even in my memory. According to my grandmother and Uncle, her husband was a hard working, pleasant fellow. I've seen his picture, too. He was extremely handsome. She had a neck and legs that resembled tree trunks.


Anyway, I am related to Websters, Silveys, Cables, Caines, Geigers (or Gygers), Robinsons...and plenty more than that. Gran knows them all. Who will visit when she is gone? I should have taken notes. Gran always puts red flowers for her dad. They were his favorites. And Mimi likes all sorts of colorful ones. Lilac, she said, for sure. Having a suitable death and a suitable grave were never treated for them the way they are for us. Cemeteries are not scary or even macabre. You don't go there to dwell on someone's death, rather to remember his or her life. Nowadays you're not allowed to contemplate how you are remembered. We're supposed to assume we are immortal or something. I don't know.

After the cemetery, we met Nanny at her work, and all went to the VFW Veterans' Day dinner in Gravois. They had it in the school house that Gran went to in second grade! She told me, "See that stage? I performed on that stage! I was a snowflake. But Patty so-and-so was the snow princess." I don't remember which Patty, but she ended up marrying a Webster. Family, you see. After dinner, Gran was trying to see if anyone could remember which parts of the building were original, and the lady asked. "Did you know a Cleo Geiger?" Well, that, as you now know, is my great-grandmother. We were as bad as Ernie Hibdon, at that point, and when we finally left to head for the car, we ran into the daughter of the scandalous Quincey or whatever his name was. She's a little old lady now, of course.

I called my own Veteran when we got home, but he was still at work. Poor thing.

We did more work with pictures. I cut apart all the copies we'd made and finished off the envelopes with them, then we separated them into suitcases. One for military reunions, one for other trips, one for the envelopes for mom and her siblings, to be given to them at Thanksgiving to take home. Group family pictures, pets, and the ones of my grandparents were put in a separate suitcase for the kids to look at, but not keep. Requests for copies are expected, of course. I heard lots more stories about the families then, too. Maybe what I really needed was a tape recorder.

The one thing I pushed for but didn't get, as yet, was for Mama Gran to write on the backs of the black and white pictures of the Geigers and the Robinsons. They have no names, dates, locations..... They are blank, and she's probably the only one who knows the details.

As we were finishing up for the day, Uncle Pete jumped up, horrified, and rushed out the door. He was retrieving the American flag, which had been flying for Veterans' Day. It was after dark when he remembered. But he came back in laughing, because my grandparents have a street light in their front yard, and so there had not been any disrespect for the flag, after all.

Thursday I helped Gran clean. We met my mom and kids at B&B. This time we had cheeseburgers. Then we all played at Gran's house in the leaves until I had to pack up and go. By then some things were all starting to catch up with me. They all smoke, and my throat was starting to be sore. Gran keeps her house very warm, and I was unable to sleep nights. So, I was worn out before I even started to go home, but there was lots to load into the car, and lots to load out of it. Everyone provided junk food for the kids, and I have my folder of pictures, and Gran gave me a squash. I wasn't really planning to make butternut squash two weeks in a row.... You know, I saw a bald eagle on my way back home. I really had no idea they ever came through Missouri. And in Versailles on Wednesday night I saw a huge owl.

Well! Now for the news since I've been back home. Josh had the test for the dispatcher position in St. Peters. The good news is that if all the groups of applicants are like his, he has a decent chance of being selected. The other good news is that they offer full benefits and 17 something starting wage. The bad news is that the selection won't even take place for several more months. After the testing, there will be formal interviews, and then background checks. There are only 2 open positions, but over 100 applicants. He really wants the job. I want him to have what he wants, even though I don't know which variety of shift work it will be.

Even if I have more to say, this is long enough. SO! I hope you are having a wonderful Friday, even if it is Friday the 13th!!! Next stop - Thanksgiving!!!! Smile. It will all be okay.

Next time, the politics of a "Constitutionalist". Heh, heh, heh....

Fiddle Dee Dee! Tomorrow is another day.

Well, Josh dropped the class, and we're very likely to have to pay for it at some point. He also got a letter saying that he passed the first round of elimination for the dispatch job. He has a practical test that they scheduled for this coming Friday. I'm not sure what is after that. Probably formal interviews. I also don't know when he'll find out if he got the job. Still no word on the home re-financing, except that our paperwork is "being processed". Not so much in the relief department, but who's counting?

We've been talking about just exactly how bleak a Christmas we're going to have, but Josh really doesn't want to talk about it, yet. His side of the family always has three Christmases. One at his mother's (food and gifts required), one at his maternal grandmother's (food, "game money", and gifts required) and one at his paternal grandparents' (food and gifts required). My mother usually has something, too, but nothing is required except an R.S.V.P. My take on it is that people who are planning these events need to know as soon as possible what to expect from us. But he doesn't want to think about it, yet.

We had our taiko performance last night in Osage Beach. We got there super early. We even went and visited with Jenn, Bill and Carter at her mom and dad's place at the lake. It's a lovely house with a beautiful view. And I'm always glad to see Jenn's family! I hear her brother had a date this week. So cute! And while we were having these adventures, everyone else was having disasters. Andrew and Junsei missed the exit, and Jaci's car broke down. The performance part went well, for the most part. There were a few hiccups, and I'm still not convinced that I wasn't at the root of the biggest one, but on the whole, a success. One shock to me was that it was listed as a free show, but my mother says they charged at the door! I was very embarrassed, since I invited my grandmother and aunt to come. She paid their way. I wonder if I should try to pay her back. After the performance and after receiving lots of praise from my too generous relatives, Josh, the kids and I went to his mother's condo to spend the night. The kids were absolutely delighted with the bunk bed. I let them play around on the top bunk this morning. I didn't sleep wonderfully, but better than I thought I would. Must've been tired. We left this morning and got home before 11am. Josh was cheerful. Said it was like a mini-vacation. (A sad commentary on our "vacations" of late, but still happy. I'll take it.)

I forgot to mention that Josh and I watched Serenity the other night. We really liked it. It's Sci-Fi action/adventure for those of you who are unaware.

I've been packed since Friday morning, but I'm not quite set to leave for Gran's tomorrow. I haven't made the cake yet. But the mix is on the counter and I chopped (okay, smashed) the walnuts up. I also need to put everything in one place so I don't forget anything important. I'm bringing my book (Still Daddy Long Legs. Been busy.) and my binder of DVD's in case we want to watch something after we've gone through pictures, and some of my favorite black tea to go nicely with the spice cake...and my clothes and stuff. And the cake, when it's made.

Josh fried fish tonight, no kidding! I told him my Aunt Joyce's formula: coat the fish in plain ole yellow mustard first, then the fish fry. Don't worry, it really doesn't come out tasting mustardy. He was very pleased with himself when it turned out, and told me my aunt is a genius. He's kinda cute, that boy.

But now my little Abbie is falling asleep on my arm. Bedtime! I was sad to hear that seeing me perform still wasn't very easy for her. According to my mother, after every song, she said, "Mommy's all done now? I want to be by Mommy." I wonder how she'll do at my mom's house this week while I'm at Gran's....

Hope you have all had a pleasant week. Trish, hoping for news of your little baby any time now. Master Awesome, do you still read this? Just checking. Love to all of you!

More bad news.

Josh had another low test score in Calculus. Realistically, it's unlikely he will get a C in the class. When the GI bill pays for school, you have to pass the class, or you suddenly have to come up with the money to pay them back. Also, I got $800.00 out of my super secret emergency fund to help with the house payments until the refinancing paperwork goes through. It was gone in a week. Not just gone, we somehow have negative bank money. Josh is going to find out if he has to pay for a D, and what will happen if he drops the class instead. We don't know what to do about the rest.

If you know of a way for me to work at home, now would be the time to speak up. Writing didn't pay worth the time and effort. Besides I felt very unappreciated with all those rejections. No one wanted me to proofread, so that was a bust, too. And the lady down the street never showed up, so that's not going to happen, either. Is there something out there that doesn't involve phone work (my kids are noisy) or an initial investment? Data entry? Maybe at your work? I promise to work for less than the going rate. I'm desperate.

I didn't get any sleep last night. Watched DVDs with Josh to cheer him up, and then later I wasn't feeling well. I have a small sore throat and more headache-ness.

This Saturday is our performance, and it's also the birthday party for Josh's 3rd sister, Missy. They're planning to recite a bunch of jokes about Missy, as a toast. You know, blond jokes and the like. Personally, if a room full of people started laughing about how dumb I was, I would leave and never come back. And she gets mad faster than anyone I've ever seen. I'm gonna go ahead and say that was poor planning. And I will be off performing in Osage Beach, so if there is blood, I will miss out. It's gonna be a mess. She never considers their wants/needs/intentions and they never consider hers. And I hate the, "Oh, I'm just giving you trouble," thing that they do, when they never get to know a person well enough to be aware of what might offend them. If they're "giving you trouble" then, somehow, it's YOUR fault if you are offended, not theirs.

Um. I didn't mean to talk about that.

Grant is in his room, screaming his lungs out. Abbie is on the couch watching Mama Mirabelle on DVD. Josh is at work, and I am counting the hours until taiko. I need to get out of here. I couldn't be more pleased that I'm going to my grandmother's next week.

So depressed.

Or...maybe not. I always knew it would get worse, not better. I guess I'll just keep going.

In the meantime, let me know if you think of something for me to do here. Or if you see a great job listing for Josh, that would be wonderful, too. He has "some college" and Veteran's status and management experience and technical experience and A+ computer repair certification....

Well, anyway.

I almost wrote an email to everyone I've ever met begging for that sort of help, but couldn't do it.

I started reading Daddy Long Legs again. And sometimes I think I have a short story waiting to come out, but no writing yet. Grant has cavities on his fillings (okay, around his fillings is more accurate), and still has a bulge by his gum. His appointment this month isn't going to be cheap. And did I tell you that our land line/internet bill went up, and quality went down when they changed ownership this month? Grr!

Hope your November is shaping up to be more secure than mine. The good news is that we don't live on a dirt floor. That we have running water and climate control. That we are healthy, and we have each other. We have fun events in our future, like Thanksgiving.

"That's all I have to say about that."

All Saints Day

Hello!

Did you have a happy Halloween?? I hope you did. Ours was nice. My cousin Mackenzie and my mother joined us. I had made spice cake cupcakes with cream cheese icing and a pot of tea. Mackenzie likes my favorite jasmine tea, so I made that, but I have some other teas that might have gone better with the cupcakes. Mom brought tons of goodies. Abbie is currently wearing her new Halloween pajamas, and Grant got a shirt with a bat. Plus, she brought canned corn, a giant frozen roast, hot chocolate, cereal, goldfish crackers, and tons of "extra" Halloween candy.

We watched Young Frankenstein. Fun. And mom and the kids played with the window clings she brought for them. We ordered Chinese for dinner, and I had an apple pie for dessert with some yummy ice cream. Josh had just ice cream, in fact. Then, we played Scrabble until it was time to put on costumes. Josh was Torry Holt at work, and was going to go out as him, but changed his mind at the last second and didn't wear a costume.

Abbie had a white turtleneck and white knit tights under her ballerina costume, and Grant wore his new bat shirt under his giraffe head costume. Mom stayed to pass out candy while the rest of us went out. We only went to a few houses. Mr. Danny, our friends, the Keiths, Mr. Bob, Mr. Major.... The Cole's house, his mom surprised me by asking me if I would like to watch Cole's baby sister Joey for $50 a week. I told her to come by Monday (tomorrow) and we'd talk about it. At first, I couldn't believe my luck, but now I have lots to consider before our discussion.

At this point, we ran into Bree and walked together with her. After 3 more houses we went back inside, and Bree and her daddy came in for cupcakes. Then they went on to more houses, and we settled in. Mackenzie beat me at Guitar Hero, and then we put on The Curse of the Ware-rabbit. We took turns passing out candy. The kids were all nice and polite this year. One girl, who must have been 9-ish, told me some perfectly horrible Halloween jokes. Loved it. And everyone commented on Brother's wonderful pumpkin. The thing is....we have several pounds of leftover candy. The last movie was the other Wallace and Gromit one, A Matter of Loaf and Death. Mackenzie was enjoying it so much that she asked for a copy.

I hope they had a good time. We did.

This morning Junsei and I were the only two "instructors" at beginner taiko practice. He played shime, and I played all the parts of Isami Goma over and over and over and over. They all thought I was funny, hopping from one side to the other so that side of the room would know it was their turn to play. And I have to say, playing Isami is much more fun than playing Renshu Taiko. After class, there was a man who wanted a better explanation, and Junsei was trying to lock up, so when I came home, I wrote a detailed "songsheet" with diagrams and everything, and it took me almost 2 hours. I'm going to try to email it to him, but if that doesn't work, he'll have to wait until next Sunday to get it.

Did I tell you that Josh and I stayed up one night and watched The Proposal? Cute writing. I liked it pretty well. I'd watch it again. We want to watch the copy of Serenity that Brother gave me pretty soon, too. The kids have been watching Kiki's Delivery Service in Japanese this week. It's cute. Very harmless, and slightly less numbing than Totoro.

This week: performance practice for taiko, Parents As Teachers visit, meet with Stephanie the neighbor about watching her daughter. I think if all of the scheduling part of it works out, I might propose a month's probationary period, in case the personalities aren't a good mix. (And in case I don't find her reliable in payment/pick-up times, etc.)

Ah! I must go. Have a wonderful evening!!!!!